Either you run the day, or the day runs you.”– Jim Rohn, author
On the surface, it’s hard to argue Rohn’s quote. It sounds good.
But, don’t most days end up running you no matter what you do?
It sure feels like it, doesn’t it?
When I first heard that quote, I thought it was powerful. It called out to me to go take on the day, dammit!
I’m feeling different about it today, however.
Maybe you have to dig a bit? You have to ask yourself, “What is running me?” Then, do a pivot and start calling the shots.
Sure, that’s it. Just start calling the shots. Let’s do that, are you with me?
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, it’s most likely because you’ve given the power over to someone else.
Really?
I have a different idea. It might not sell a lot of books, but see what you think?
What if we could “suspend the rules” for a day? What if we could suspend all the rules that seem to control our lives? Not forever, just for one day. What would that feel like? How cool would that be?
Just a day to hit the pause button. That’s all.
Yes, we have responsibilities. I know, we have obligations too. I wouldn’t forget about those.
Just to be clear, I’m not talking about neglecting those close to you and those important to you. The people in our lives always matter.
Usually, there’s a simple tradeoff though, a choice. Too often our immediate response is, “I don’t have a choice.” But maybe we do. Recognize it’s a zero-sum game and make the choice that’s best. I get this, or I get that. The best choice for me right now is this.
That’s easier to accept than an assertion that you just start any day with your leg up.
I recently read a post on medium.com by Jessica Wildfire (that’s got to be a pen name) called “13 Tips to succeed your way.” A few of her tips, as simple as they sound, could help us a lot when it feels like the day is running us over.
10. Don’t overload yourself. Focus on one major project. Don’t take things on to impress. Tell them what you’ve finished, not all the things you’re supposedly doing right now.”
The key is in the last line of that quote, especially when bosses are involved. Lead with the good news, the things you’ve finished. It sets the tone of the conversation to one of accomplishment.
Sure, it’s easy for her to say, “Don’t overload yourself” and “Focus on one major project.” Some of it comes with the territory, right? Much of the time it does. Still, lines like those come straight out of the productivity press. Ugh.
But, don’t miss that next part… the “taking things on to impress part.” This is where we do-ourselves-in so many times. Think about it before those words, “Sure, I’ll do it” slip out. How much of this “crazy-busy” epidemic is just that, taking things on to impress?
11. Surprise people. You don’t have to conform to expectations.”
Do they expect you to always say yes? Tell them all no. Show yourself what’s possible. See what happens. How bad could it be?
Seriously, this is a skill worth developing.
12. Make your life boring sometimes.”
I like this one. When all else fails, this can be your default de-pressurizer. Ponder that one for a moment. Are you willing to do that? Could you say with pride, “Hey, look at me… I have a boring life. And I love it!”
Me either, but it sure could feel good for a few days, or a week, or even a month while you depressurize. Not a bad idea.
Now, back to those rules…
Do you remember Robert? The “Rules of Order” guy. Yeah, those rules, the ones no one remembers.
But even that stuffy, old, obsessive-compulsive dude had provisions for suspending the rules. He knew there would be a need for that. There would be a time in any finely-tuned organization when the rules just didn’t fit the occasion.
If iron-clad Robert can do it, so can you.
I started out all tongue-in-cheek with this suspend the rules thing, but there is an underlying message…
We can choose what we say yes to and what we say no to.
All those demands and expectations have piled up and become unmanageable.
It feels like there are rules forcing us to keep taking on more and more. They come to us in the form of expectations, agendas and beliefs. Beliefs like if we keep getting better and more efficient, we’ll be able to handle it all.
everything”—the notion that we can do it all, perfectly, right now—is a great, big, self-sabotaging con. — Greg McKeown, author of “Essentialism – The disciplined Pursuit of Less”
With practice, we can begin to weed these out. And we can “suspend the rules.” The ones that aren’t really rules at all. They’re just choices… choices with one of the options disguised as a rule.
Let’s work on that.
One rule I’ve been unable to suspend is getting my stuff together for the taxman… I’ll see you after that is finished!
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Copyright © 2018 Jeff Meister – All Rights Reserved
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